Their Up to No Good

Alert readers may note that I made a grammatical error in the title of this post. I have not suddenly gone senile, although things are moving in that direction. No, I did it on purpose to get you’re attention. And they’re is another one (and another!), two deliberate mistakes to introduce my latest topic: high school English teachers who hate English.

A self-identified “cringey” California English teacher claimed she combats “white supremacy” “B.S.” in her classroom by teaching students about the overemphasized importance of grammar usage and writing rules.

Marta Shaffer, a tenured English teacher at Oroville High School, began the 2022-2023 academic year by teaching parts of linguistics as a way of “fighting white supremacy in my classes,” according to her posts on TikTok. The goal was to be “inclusive of all kinds of ways we use the language.”

According to Shaffer, expectations for students to use proper grammar and syntax is part of White supremacy culture that “runs deep.”

I had to look up the word ‘cringey’. It isn’t in our Random House Unabridged Dictionary, which is over 1,900 pages But apparently the word has been created. Here is the definition from Google:

crin·gey /ˈkrinjē/
adjective
INFORMAL

1. 1.
   causing feelings of acute embarrassment or awkwardness.
   “one of his cringey attempts at camaraderie”

‘Cringey’ is an example of changing a perfectly good word to give it more of a ‘feel good’ sound. A more common instance is found in fast food advertisements telling you a sandwich is topped with ‘melty’ cheese. Or maybe it is spelled ‘meltie’: I couldn’t find this in our dictionary either. I assume they mean ‘melted’, and that melty is not some rare type of artisanal formage from the south of France.

While I’m on the grammar pulpit, will people please quit mixing up ‘less’ and ‘fewer’? My favorite example of this is a radio commercial for a prostate supplement, which assures men who take it that they will have “less urges to go“. Every time I hear it I cringe. Or maybe I get ‘cringey’.

According to this English teacher who hates English, proper use of grammar and syntax is yet another example of ‘White Supremacy Culture’. Thus Usage joins Mathematics, Sheet Music, and Punctuality as a tool of oppression used against people of color. If you read my blog regularly you will already know that. And if not, why don’t you? I promise to complete my sentences, which is something the California Department of Corrections does not insist on.

Anybody remember Barbara Jordan? I’m not going to explain who she is; Google can help you. But what I do remember about her is her incredible eloquence in the House Judiciary Committee investigating Watergate in 1975, defending The Constitution. I was only a teenager and I can still hear her. I don’t think her high school English teachers thought proper usage was part of white supremacy culture.